Part 2: The Emotional Side
Last week, I shared the most common day-to-day struggles raised by dog guardians in a large online training group: pulling on the lead, ignoring recall, dog reactivity, and destructive behaviour. But that wasn’t the full picture. There’s so much that came out of learning what dog guardians are struggling with.
Among those same posts were deep emotional challenges. Ones that go beyond basic training and into the heart of how dogs feel, and how their guardians are coping.
Today I want to talk about those dogs: the anxious ones, the fearful ones, the reactive ones, and yes, the aggressive ones.
Dogs With Big Feelings
A huge number of the posts I read mentioned fear, anxiety, or emotional shutdown. Some dogs had come from rescue situations and were clearly traumatised. Others had been raised from puppies in loving homes, but still reacted to noises, unfamiliar people, or changes in routine.
This tells us something important: fear-based behaviours aren’t just a rescue dog thing. And they’re not a “training failure.” They’re emotional responses to the world, and they deserve compassion and support.
Separation Anxiety Appears To Be On The Rise
More than a few guardians shared heartbreaking posts about dogs who couldn’t cope being alone – howling, barking, escaping, even destroying doors or fences to try and find someone. Often, these were dogs who had always had someone home, until life changed. Covid ended and we all had to return to our busy lives leaving dogs whom we weren’t equipped to support.
And when these dogs also can’t be left indoors (due to damage), can’t be left outside (due to escape risk), and pet sitters are out of budget, their guardians are stuck between caring for their dog and preventing destruction of their home.
There are no quick fixes for separation anxiety. But the first step is understanding it’s not a behavioural problem. It’s a panic problem. And it needs to be treated with patience, safety, and structured support for both the dog and the guardian.
Dogs Who Lash Out
There were also several posts about dogs who had bitten. Sometimes a person, sometimes another dog, sometimes their own family member. This is understandably confronting, and many of the guardians were devastated.
Here’s the truth: dogs who bite are not doing so out of dominance or spite. They’re often in conflict. They’re scared, overwhelmed, or in pain and they don’t have the tools to cope.
Aggression isn’t a diagnosis. It’s a symptom. And in most cases, it’s possible to reduce or eliminate the risk with professional help, calm routines, and safety-first training.
It’s Not Just The Dogs Who Are Struggling
What stood out in nearly every post was how hard these situations were on the humans. People were scared, guilty, exhausted, and sometimes ashamed to talk about it.
But here’s the thing: dogs don’t need perfect humans. They need understanding ones. Ones who are willing to learn, adapt, and ask for help. And the fact that you’re reading this probably means you’re already doing that.
What Next?
If you’ve got a dog who’s anxious, reactive, or struggling to cope with life, please know this: you are not alone. The challenges are real, but so is the hope.
Your first port of call should be your veterinarian. They are the best as determining if your dog is in pain, or if treatments or medications might help them. We love working with veterinarians to help dogs and their humans. Then we can look at games-based, force-free training which helps dogs build confidence and feel safe in their environment. It doesn’t force them to suppress their emotions. It helps them handle them.
There are also some great resources available over at the Pet Professional Guild Australia website
Let’s stop blaming the dog or the guardian. Let’s start building better support systems for both.
When You Book an In-Home Consultation
I offer gentle, practical training for dogs who are struggling with fear, frustration, reactivity or anxiety, and for the people who love them. Being a force-free trainer isn’t just about the methods we use to support your dog. It’s also about the methods we use to support you. We have a no judgement, no shame policy. You don’t know until you do know. So ditch the embarrassment and visit the Services page to book a one-to-one consultation, or just to find out more.
Game On! Let’s Play!
Hxx
Written with the assistance of AI
